Get Rich or Jump Off a Cliff

This is not your secret. Make your own!

I am always puzzled by people that constantly read motivational books. Personally, I have always regarded this eager readership somewhere between drug addicts and religious fanatics. On the one side is a junkie who cannot live without all Robert Kiyosaki’s bestsellers and on the other, a fanatic who subscribes to prosperity like a religion – (“Hi, I’m Bob and I’m a reader, who’s not yet rich”.., “Hi, Bob!!”).

DISCLAIMER: If you take offense with the way the word ‘YOU’ is used here just consider it to mean “the other guy”

Now, don’t get me wrong, knowledge is indeed power, but when do you put down that book and translate that poetic written, hard cash, hard cover ‘my-story’ knowledge into work?

I have seen high school drop-outs move out of their poor dad’s homes and become rich dads just by sweating it out in some informal business (also known as Jua Kali in Kenya) and of course, marrying a woman that can give birth. Rich+Dad = taraaa!!!

I couldn’t make it past the second chapter of a motivational book where the word ‘you’ had been used so many times, it felt like I was getting bitch slapped.

‘It is the purpose of this book to tell YOU how to get whatever YOU (yes, YOU!!!) want. Let’s get it clear: When this book says: “You,” it means YOU (yes, YOU!!!). This book is a complete success course specifically for YOU- to enable YOU to get whatever YOU want. This book is written for YOU, whoever YOU are, wherever YOU are, whatever YOUR skin colour…. THIS BOOK IS FOR YOU (yes YOU!!!)

Note to Self: Return stupid book to Ex’s mother.

You’ve got to admit; motivational books breed lethargy, kill creativity and encourage dependency. Is it so hard to get your lazy bum off that couch without a life-coach telling you how to? You actually think you are far much better living by somebody’s secret just to get richer? No wonder you’ll never write your bestseller! And what happened to creativity and discovery? What happened to finding you own path? What happened to your self-esteem?

No seriously, if 6 billion of us read that book, would we ALL be rich? C’mon, it’s time you grew a backbone. Man up! Work! And remember we’re all heading in that same direction – six feet under: no money, no house, no Botox. Just do this thing called life, and make sure it’s your life, not the other guys.

10 thoughts on “Get Rich or Jump Off a Cliff

  1. I’m ridin with this writer to the end, 100% co-sign. Come to think of it. If Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Sir Richard Branson were all to pen they success stories on papers I believe some Success/Motivational- Hungry Human being would buy the three books. Let jump into what the books would have ( a lil preview homie ) : 1) Time Management 2) Focus 3) Sacrifice 4) Endurance – if i’m not wrong all these virtues are in the Bible, yes the Holy Bible..okay let’s check some extracts that prolly won’t be written for you to consume : 1) every penny you spend on this book,makes me more richer my bank manager gives me a hug. 2) How Apple steal patents n escape law-suits…that has contributed to Steve Jobs’ success. You the reader will you follow that? Pow!! 3) How Branson fought Dialexia,yes that’s a disease..4) Why Bill Gates dropped out of college/Uni…again we have a Drug dealer who’s in the top10 world richest people,will you read her success story too?
    So why are people so obsessed with this motivational books? That their is pure drug addiction like the writer put it. I got problem with folks that love inspirational quotes from people speeches..that sh*t is crazy.

    • It’s even worse now that these books come in audio. Imagine listening to the same i-can-do-it ‘chant’ on way to and from work? How depressed can you be?

    • I love Inspirational Quotes. My personal favorite:

      Voltaire – “A witty saying proves nothing.”


      But I have to agree with Mr. Burns. I read books for information, but seldom for inspiration. Yes, I own some self help books, but i own more books about Ninjas and Africa than I do about “Getting Rich” and “Living healthy”. Why? because with every ninja book, i learn something new. But with every self-help book, i just find out that there are even more rich people out there than i thought before and that i really need to get on my game and make some money…lol. Quite depressing if you ask me.

  2. Lol today its seems am getting to rant enough about self help books. 90% of which are marketed to women, coincidence? I think not. But funny how women who read such have the most sorry lives ever its unbelievable and their self esteem is almost non existent. My pal has bought so many yet she has had one man in her life(her first boyfie after graduation at 23yrs of age) and he was a sorry ass excuse for man.

    Loose weight for dummies-They end up adding more yet you have spent a couple thousands on a stupid book instead of paying for a gym.

    How to be a millionair-Getting advice from a guy with whom is getting his first milli from proceeds from that book.(ever notice how the authors arent worth a dime)

    How to find a husband-Author single or divorced so many times its annoying.

    • Actually, 90% are read by well educated (literate if you like) people, who’ve got good jobs, and health insurance but think they lack the resources and the guts to be anybody in life.

      Seriously, if I had to get advice on managing my money, it would have to be from a beggar. If that guy is healthy, hasn’t seen a doctor in the last 10 years, eats, drinks and is alive.., wouldn’t you want to know just how he get’s by and improve on that?

      • But well educated doesnt translate to good lives or high self esteem. I still dont get the idea of those messed up things, my mum bought me a book back in 2006, I was 2nd year, about How to be an A student, I already knew how to be one, never even opened a page on that book, I sold it to my pal(am mean, I know) lol

        But I kubali on the begger part.

      • I get my advice from drug dealers and bankers. Druggies tell me how to make money, bankers tell me how to keep it.

        I listen to both and then do the opposite. Try it, it works.

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