I do a lot of customer care work for my clients, mostly with artists. And artists come with egos. And temperaments. And bitch fits. So I know what it’s like to be polite when someone is spewing a lot of bull.
But really, Zuku this is a bit too much.
My business runs primarily online. Which means no internet = no money. I switched from using Orange because every time it rained [or shined … uh .. shone, or the wind blew, or anything really] the internet would go off. Plus, Orange sucks at webcam.
So I went with Zuku. It’s fast, it’s reliable, and it’s pocket friendly. There’s just ONE thing wrong with it. The customer care people suck.
I’d been warned about this over and over and over, but I figured they can’t be that bad, right? I mean as long as I pay my bills on time, I don’t have to deal with *&%@^!*#$&; so it’ll be fine, right?
I paid my first fee on 11th of May. I was informed that it would take 3 weeks to install. I called on 28th and was told they’d come by on Monday or Tuesday.
They said they’d call on Sunday to book the specific day and time.This after being put on hold for ever. In fact, the second the phone rang, it went on hold. BEFORE I’d even spoken to anyone. How now?
I’ll give props to James though, because when he eventually did get on the phone, he was very professional. He actually had me laughing, which is classic considering how angry I was.
And yes, I did tell him their customer care sucks.
Monday is my day off from the office, so I mostly stay home and/or attend outside meetings. Tuesday, June 1st was a public holiday. By Sunday, I’d heard no word, so I called again asking if they had some idea whether it would be Monday or Tuesday, or if they could at least guesstimate the time, because I couldn’t sit in the house waiting for 48 hours. Nothing doing.
They did eventually show up at around 9.00 a.m. Tuesday morning, pyjamas notwithstanding. They were very polite and did a great job of installation, using clips and pliers and lots and lots of wire. I’ve never seen my wiring look so neat … and I have a lot of wiring. I almost wanted to offer them tea!
During the month service has been good. There’ve been one or two outages, but I usually call my brother before I call Zuku. Why? Because it costs less. My account manager is not very nice – she hardly ever smiles on the phone. I’d rather call Zuku direct, but that costs too much because I’ll be put on hold, which is murder on a cellphone.
So I‘d rather call baby brother, who lives five minutes from here, have him check if his internet is working, and if not, he can call his much nicer account manager who’ll solve the problem and voila, my net works.
But yesterday my bro’s internet was fine, so I had to do my own dirty work. I’d been at a workshop all day and their net was down, so when I got home at 8, all I wanted to do was get online for my daily fix.
Only, there was no net.
I didn’t think my account manager would appreciate being called at 8.00 p.m on a Friday night, so I called Customer Care direct. It cost me 12 bob [Yay Amua Tarriff!] to stay on hold for two minutes and listen to annoying mood music – and I didn’t get to talk to anyone. I decided to sleep on it.
Next morning, still no luck, so I took the risk and called my account manager. She’s scary.
She wasn’t at work yet, but said she was on her way. A little over an hour later I called her again, and she informed me that my account has been disconnected. I wish she’d called me back and saved me the hour of staring at the monitor while it went on and off again.
I asked why and she was blank for a second, before asking when it was installed. I explained that I’d paid in May but it was installed in June, so she spoke to the billing department and they reconnected me.
I asked why they’d disconnected me in the first place, because I’d asked severally when my bill was due, and they’d informed that I would be issued with an online reminder which I hadn’t received yet. Plus, I figured my bill was due on the first.
I also asked a few more questions about paying via Pesa Point and the period between payment and reconnection; 20 minutes if I pay at the Zuku office.
I was looking at my screen the entire time, so I saw the icon alerting me that my internet was back on. Yay! But I still couldn’t connect. So after three more restarts and some IT crowd-inspired advice [‘Have you tried putting it off and on again’], I called my account manager.
It rang twice, then went into busy mode. I waited two minutes then dialled again
‘The Zain mobile you’re calling is busy’
Maybe she’s in a meeting.
After about twenty minutes I called a third time and explained the problem, so she offered to have one of the customer care people call me. Apparently, she’s in sales.
Le grande sigh.
A nice lady did call, me, Joyce, and she walked me through Windows 7 and how to get the thing back on.
I asked whether it was possible to be … reassigned, and she said that if there’s a … clash … with my account manager, then she can arrange for another one, and took down my preferences on the matter. I just want somebody nice. I mean, since it’s Customer Care, I’m calling to complain and get a problem solved, so I prefer not to have a fight.
I told her all the things I love about Zuku, and the one thing I hate, so let it not be said I rushed to rant online. She was patient and polite, and even suggested alternatives. Alas, I am content. I just have to pay my bill before Wednesday or they’ll cut me off.
Credit where credit is due. To Joyce and James of Zuku **clap clap clap** James was nice, polite, and professional, and Josephine put up with my technophobia admirably. Somebody give these people a raise. Zuku Management: Are you listening?
And lastly Zuku, thanks for giving me a new Account Manager. I’m eternally grateful, and a thousand blessings shall be sent your way accompanied by goodwill, graceful aging, and perhaps brown elephants too. Still waiting for that number though…
♫ Meet Virginia ♫ Train ♫