The Pope Is Not Your Sex Therapist


The other day, people all across the world gasped and gawked as Pope Benedict said that it was okay for prostitutes(and really anybody) to use condoms if it helped prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS. Churchgoers screamed ‘Foul!’ Scientists screamed ‘Liar!’ Nymphomaniacs screamed ‘Yeah!’ (c)Lil’ Jon – and I sat there wondering what the fuss was about.

First off, the Pope tracing the path to righteousness for prostitutes is about as pretentious as Continue reading

AGNES, YOU’RE THE MAN!

Dear Agnes,

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, OH MY GOD!"

Consider this your 1,000,000th fan mail. Yup, you’re my winner!! Actually, you stole my heart. You captured my attention and captivated my mind while Ciku busted you on live national radio. Seriously girl, you did it! Whatever your reasons, you courageously stepped into male territory and did what a man would do and not get the kind of heat coming your way – you cheated and got caught. Continue reading

THE VILLAGE MARKET HALLOWEEN FRIGHT NIGHT PARTY

This October, celebrate the biggest Halloween Party since the Dark Ages 

The Village Market Halloween Fright Night Party

On Saturday 30th October, The Village Market opens its doors to all daring zombies, vampires, goblins and beautiful monsters. Featuring the darkest House of Horrors, Pandora’s Box, The Beathogs, Dashy Krew, Code Red DJs and so much more. An electrifying display of fireworks will light up the sky and wake the very dead.

Dresscode: FRIGHTENING!!!!

See press and posters  OR call 020 7122488-90 for details

Spare The Rod?

Dearly beloved,

We are gathered here today to say ‘kwaheri’ (farewell) to something that’s been a member of every Kenyan household and very dear to our hearts and indeed our bums for decades. Today we say adieu to the ‘kiboko’ a.k.a. the ‘cane’ or the ‘rod’. Here in Kenya, the kiboko has touched the lives of many both young while in the hands of ‘loving’ parents, equally ‘concerned’ relatives and friends and not forgetting those overzealous school teachers. Personally, I could say I owe my relatively turbulent-free formative years to the kiboko for putting the fear of God in me and keeping me on the straight and narrow path.

As you are aware, the kiboko met its fatal demise on August 27th 2010 at around 10:25pm at Uhuru Park with the promulgation of the New Constitution of Kenya. Continue reading

When Religion Forgot About God


Disclaimer: If you’re here to insult believers, your comment will get deleted. If you’re here to discuss religion, be open-minded.

It was September 11th the other day.

For many, they remember the twin towers crashing, killing thousands and decimating any progress that had been made towards the acceptance of Muslims in America, and ultimately, the West. Reason being, the culprits behind it said that their motivation was religious thus pissing petrol onto the simmering corpses of the innocent and the raging flames of the burning buildings.

They did it because it was right – nay, necessary – by God.

Just as many before them have done. More people have died in the name of religion than have because of politics or money. More lives have been extinguished by God’s supposed ‘Word’ than have perished in any natural disaster ever. And why? Is there something fundamentally wrong with religion? Continue reading

The Truth About Freemasons in Kenya

The truth shall set you free
One of the earliest pieces on DR was a rebuttal to Zuqka’s speculative nonsensical article that claimed that several of our favorite artists were Masons; more specifically, that Jay-z was part of some secret society. Hogwash really.

But what isn’t hogwash is how Kenyans feel about such groups of people. We have been polarized to react acidicly negatively to Freemasons – or as many call them, Devil Worshippers & Satanists – because they supposedly drink blood drained from virgin children’s necks and pray in dark rooms with no windows while having orgies with abducted prostitutes. But how much of this stigma is really true? Here are 10 things you need to know about Freemasons before you pass judgment. Continue reading