Nairobi Stinks

Disclaimer: Do not read this while eating or if you have a weak stomach.

My tummy was so upset this morning that I didn’t even have my trademark cup of black coffee(a.k.a. Diesel). Instead, I showered, brushed my teeth, got dressed, dabbed some cologne on and headed to work.

Half an hour later, I was in a KBS shuttle wondering why I hadn’t invested in a bazooka yet. I could use it to clear traffic during my morning commute, plus nobody would mug a guy walking around with a bazooka and a bag full of ammo. As I visualized explosions, mayhem and clear roads, an evil smirk crept across my face and my eyes lit up. A driver in the car next to me stared back in fear.

That’s when my daydream halted and the morning went sour. I saw one of those City Council inspectors, strolling down the isle. Well, I didn’t see him, per se.

The smell of January’s sweat fermenting in his armpits as well as a distinctly 2009 stench from his clothes bitch-slapped me across the face. Continue reading